Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize