I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
