is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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