I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
