What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
I intend to get homeless drunk
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Randomize
