Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
