my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
