He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize