it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
