Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.