"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed