i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
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