My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
i already hear my dad disowning me
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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