On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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