I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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