He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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