you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
