Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Randomize
