can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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