I wish they made helmets for livers.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize