Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Randomize
