If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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