Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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