its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
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