Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
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