franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
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