i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
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