i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize