You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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