he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
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