Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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