why do cheetos always look like penises
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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