So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
