That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
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