READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
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