Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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