**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
where am i from again
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
