how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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