Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
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