I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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