I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Randomize
