so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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