worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
