Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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