Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Randomize
