Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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