True but thats because hes a fetus.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
