So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Michael Bay diarrhea
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
