So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
My liver just broke up with me...
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
