It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
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