i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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